Ticklish Ideas

I just got a video clip from my brother. In it, Larry the Cable Guy sings carols for his encore. The one that sticks in my mind goes like this:

O Come all ye Immigrants
Gi-it yer Green Cards
Learn some damn English
And then how to drive.

(The views expressed are not necessarily those of the blogger)

The response I sent my brother begins with a "WooooHooooo" and ends with the lyrics of my all-time favorite altered carol:

God rest ye Unitarians, let nothing you dismay
There's no historic evidence there was a Christmas day
When Christ was born is just not known, no matter what they say,
O, Tidings of reason and fact, reason and fact,
Glad tidings of reason and fact

A folklorist could have a field day with tracing the different versions of these lyrics - the first page of google results contained the lyrics I remembered, a pagan history version, and version with an extra dose of cynicism. The UUA's santioned lyrics are listed beside this selection from the Gilbert and Sullivan songbook:

I am the very model of a modern Unitarian :
Far broader than a Catholic, Hindu, Jew or Presbyterian.
I know the world's religions and can trace their roots historical,
From Moses up to Channing, all in order categorical.

Speaking of Unitarian Universalist irreverent music, it was at UU camp that I learned it is possible to sing most of the hymnal to the tune of the Gilligan's Island Theme. (Thanks, Evad!)
Start your humming:

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
a tale of a fateful trip.
That started from this tropic port,
aboard this tiny ship.

The mate was a mighty sailin' man,
the skipper brave and sure.
Five passengers set sail that day,
for a three hour tour,
a three hour tour

Now, switch lyrics but keep the same tune:

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind but now I see
Was blind but now I see

T'was Grace that taught...
my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear...
the hour I first believed.

It works on hymn-influenced verse too, see:

Because I could not stop for Death—
He kindly stopped for me—
The Carriage held but just Ourselves—
And Immortality.
We slowly drove—He knew no haste
And I had put away
My labor and my leisure too,
For His Civility—
-Emily Dickenson